Speeding Turtle no Jutsu!!!!

105 days till deadline...
308 pages to edit.
I.B. Slakin

*clears his hands from his sleeves.
The turtle is the patron animal of writers. Today, we see the turtle fill the role he is destined to fill in the inevitable and proverbial race against the hare.
Today, my people, we see the turtle don his racing shorts, his favorite bandana, and his weapon of choice, the pencil(keyboard, same thing). Today, we know, because it has been prophecied that the tortoise beats the hare by our beloved St. John of Shell Island(John of Patmos stole his first book before it was published and changed the name).
Enough of this folly, on to the MEAT(not turtle meat)
I am now ready to start this thing. Today marks the first day of the rest of this process.
I am psyched, I am pumped, and I am sure that Jennifer Love Hewitt is one of the hottest women alive.
anyway, no more Bitin'; I'm Writin'
Here we go...
diving deep into the pile of papers like Scrooge McDuck in his moneybin.