Ooohhh....
Too... much... beer... last night...
Titanium drill bits grinding away at my temples...
There is, inandof itself, a sort of attraction in uncertainty.
But more importantly, the Wondering and Waiting are like to drive me mad.
In the little moments of intimacy, foreheads touching and smiles abounding, I feel wrapped in a 'warm fuzzy' feeling...
AHHH! I'm gonna shoot myself for using that, but hey, this is stream of consciousness anyway...
This feeling is a deep reddish color if you will, that starts in my chest and works it's way around my body, leaving things feeling revitalized and alive, and filled with a kind of tentative acceptance. It's a kind of charm that not a lot of people have, fewer know they have, and those very few who do know are extremely dangerous.
This girl, she does this thing far better than anyone else I have met, and having gone to Pagan Firtility Festivals, that says a lot.
She is a woman, she doesn't know what she wants.
count the redundancies in that sentence...
I don't know what I'm going to do about her.
The times I've kissed her have been times involving lots of alcohol, but last night was the first time I think I was more drunk than she was.
she's got real issues on people caring about her. I guess she has so many 'friends' who don't care about her that she can't accept that someone does care.
She told me last night, when I asked if we're still on for Comedy Off Broadway, she said, "I guess we'll see."
I think it really shook her up, or pissed her off, or something last night, when I tried to make sure she got in her friend's car. It's been kind of a test, I suspect, will you leave me alone out here even if I push you away? Though I just don't want to deal with her pushing me away like this. Maybe its some sort of hardcore weeding process, but I don't really know.
If this is something weird like a test, I hope its over soon.
she seriously flip flops on a whim. One moment she's slobbering on my face and bringing up things to do sometime, the next she's leaning on me as I walk her to her ride, then she's pushing me and telling me to go away.
Hindsight will prove, as allways, to be 20/20.
Titanium drill bits grinding away at my temples...
There is, inandof itself, a sort of attraction in uncertainty.
But more importantly, the Wondering and Waiting are like to drive me mad.
In the little moments of intimacy, foreheads touching and smiles abounding, I feel wrapped in a 'warm fuzzy' feeling...
AHHH! I'm gonna shoot myself for using that, but hey, this is stream of consciousness anyway...
This feeling is a deep reddish color if you will, that starts in my chest and works it's way around my body, leaving things feeling revitalized and alive, and filled with a kind of tentative acceptance. It's a kind of charm that not a lot of people have, fewer know they have, and those very few who do know are extremely dangerous.
This girl, she does this thing far better than anyone else I have met, and having gone to Pagan Firtility Festivals, that says a lot.
She is a woman, she doesn't know what she wants.
count the redundancies in that sentence...
I don't know what I'm going to do about her.
The times I've kissed her have been times involving lots of alcohol, but last night was the first time I think I was more drunk than she was.
she's got real issues on people caring about her. I guess she has so many 'friends' who don't care about her that she can't accept that someone does care.
She told me last night, when I asked if we're still on for Comedy Off Broadway, she said, "I guess we'll see."
I think it really shook her up, or pissed her off, or something last night, when I tried to make sure she got in her friend's car. It's been kind of a test, I suspect, will you leave me alone out here even if I push you away? Though I just don't want to deal with her pushing me away like this. Maybe its some sort of hardcore weeding process, but I don't really know.
If this is something weird like a test, I hope its over soon.
she seriously flip flops on a whim. One moment she's slobbering on my face and bringing up things to do sometime, the next she's leaning on me as I walk her to her ride, then she's pushing me and telling me to go away.
Hindsight will prove, as allways, to be 20/20.
posted by Hadrian: Dark One at 10:29 AM
1 Comments:
Hindsight has indeed proven to be 20/20.
She was still with Josh at the time, thus, why she didn't want me to walk her to her ride's car...
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